Emails Index

Chickens




A bit of technical humor.

HOW DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

Assembler Chicken: First it builds the road ...

C Chicken: It crosses the road without looking both ways.

C++ Chicken: The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you'd simply refer to him on the other side.

COBOL Chicken: 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING.
        IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES
                 THEN PERFORM 0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD
                 VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
                 ON-THE-OTHER-SIDE
        ELSE
                 GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING

Cray Chicken: Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don't dip it in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side fully cooked.

Delphi Chicken: The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other side.

G3 300 mH Chicken: It crosses twice as fast as any Pentium chicken

Gopher Chicken: Tried to run, but got flattened by the Web chicken.

Intel Pentium Chicken: The chicken crossed 4.9999978 times.

Iomega Chicken: The chicken should have backed up before crossing.

Java Chicken: If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, the server will download one to the other side. (Of course, those are chicklets.)

Lotus Chicken: Don't you dare try to cross the road the same way we do!

Mac Chicken: No reasonable chicken owner would want a chicken to cross the road, so there's no way to tell it to.

Microsoft Chicken (tm): It's already on both sides of the road. And it just bought the road.

Newton Chicken: Can't cluck, can't fly, and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it across the road in your pocket!

NT Chicken: Will cross the road in June. No, August. September for sure.

OOP Chicken: It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.

OS/2 Chicken: It crossed the road in style years ago, but it was so quiet that nobody noticed.

OS/ 8.1 HFS+ Chicken: It had much more free space to cross.

Quantum Logic Chicken: The chicken is distributed probabalistically on all sides of the road until you observe it on the side of your choice.

VB Chicken: USHighways! <TheRoad.cross> (aChicken)

Web Chicken: Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and just keeps on running.

Windows 95 Chicken: You see different colored feathers while it crosses, but cook it and it still tastes like ... chicken.

Windows 98 Chicken: It should have expected to cause a crash while crossing.

And addition: RV Chicken. Sprints down the road, passing all the other chickens for fifteen minutes, then stops abruptly and demands a valid license ticket.


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